Introduction:
Hi, I’m Max – Personal Development Strategist.
We’ve all been hurt, let down, disappointed, and betrayed. But let’s get something straight—holding onto distrust isn’t a strength, it’s a chain. The natural state of human beings is trust; you were born trusting, with no reason to doubt the world. The cynicism you hold now is a learned behavior, and it’s costing you more than you might realize.
Here’s something uncomfortable to sit with: trust is a choice. And yes, it’s one you’re making right now, whether consciously or not. You can build an airtight case for why people are untrustworthy—but you can just as easily build a case for the opposite. So the question is, why are you choosing the former?
In today’s reading, we’ll go through a three-step process that can help you recover the trust you’ve lost in people, and more importantly, reclaim the life that distrust is stealing from you.
1) What is your choice in not trusting people costing you?
Let’s cut to the chase: you’ve convinced yourself that distrusting others makes you clever, maybe even invincible. You pride yourself on not being “one of those gullible fools,” right? But who exactly is that mindset serving? Be real with yourself for a minute—what’s it costing you to live like this?
You think keeping your guard up protects you, but look closer. You’re missing out on partnerships, opportunities, and intimacy in your relationships. Vulnerability is the gateway to real connection, and if you’re refusing to trust, you’re also refusing to let people truly in. All the energy you spend guarding yourself could be used to build stronger relationships, deepen connections, and propel your business or personal life forward. This is your choice—you’re creating a reality where fear governs your relationships. Ask yourself if it’s worth it. Is this the life you want to live?
2) Do you want to hold onto this view?
You’ve been hurt, no doubt about that. But here’s the truth you need to face: by clinging to distrust, you are still letting that person who hurt you dictate how you live your life. You’re allowing them to hold power over your present. Is that what you really want? Every time you hesitate to trust, every time you hold back, you’re giving them real estate in your mind that they don’t deserve.
Distrust isn’t a shield; it’s a prison. Owning your hurt doesn’t mean wallowing in it—it means choosing to reclaim the power you’ve given away. This belief you’re carrying around—that people aren’t trustworthy—is keeping you stuck. How much of your mental energy is spent replaying old betrayals, justifying why you shouldn’t trust again? Isn’t it exhausting?
Ask yourself honestly: Do you want to carry that around for the rest of your life? If not, make the decision to let it go. Start with a simple acknowledgment: “Yes, I was hurt, but I will not allow that to control me anymore.” If you’re brave enough to make that commitment, you’ll begin to free yourself from the chains of distrust.
3) Forgive the person who broke your trust
There’s someone specific, isn’t there? Someone whose betrayal still stings. You weren’t born distrusting people, so at some point, someone hurt you enough to make you swear you’d never let it happen again. It’s understandable. But here’s the thing—by holding onto that pain, you’re the one suffering.
Forgiveness isn’t about excusing what they did—it’s about releasing the hold it has over you. You don’t have to condone their behavior to let go of the bitterness. Forgiving them doesn’t mean they were right, it means you’re choosing your freedom over their mistake. It’s not about them—it’s about freeing yourself from the emotional burden. You can either stay tied to that betrayal forever, or you can let it go and make space for the relationships you truly deserve.
Forgiveness is an act of power, not weakness. It’s you saying, “I won’t be defined by someone else’s actions.”
Conclusion:
I get it—what happened to you hurt. But refusing to trust isn’t a strength; it’s a wound you haven’t healed from. Distrust limits your life, your opportunities, and your happiness. Don’t let it define you. Rebuild your trust—not blindly, but wisely. True power lies in knowing you can trust again, not because people won’t ever hurt you, but because you won’t let that pain take away your ability to connect with others.
Are you ready to stop giving power to your past and start building meaningful connections? Let’s talk here.
Max. Personal Development Strategist.
