Introduction
Coaching and Mentoring are umbrella terms that encompass a variety of subdomains underneath them. Both are conversational practices that are geared towards the betterment of the client but there are some key, albeit subtle distinctions between these practices.
For those not in the Personal Development space, the two outcomes of today’s reading will be for you to understand the differences between these disciplines as there can be crossover, as well as understanding when each approach is more appropriate.
A classic trap that we will fall into in today’s reading for any coaches or mentors who come across this content will be that world class coaches will do a fair chunk of mentoring in their work, and world class mentors will also do a fair chunk of coaching in their work, but nevertheless, let’s move forward!
What is a Mentor?
A mentor, in my mind at least, is someone who has achieved a certain level of success in a particular domain of life who has packaged and sells their insights to their mentees. There is a fundamental distinction between mentors and coaches which is that coaches will ‘ask’, and mentors will ‘tell’. And so a skilled mentor is in some ways a skilled teacher of their insights and will guide their mentee towards their goals, leaning on their experience to do so.
There is a strong emphasis on teaching in a mentorship relationship, the imparting of a skillset from mentor to mentee. And the effectiveness of a mentor is really found in two components – the first is the ability to effectively teach their mentee, and the second is the ability to be deeply sensitive to the mentee’s unique set of challenges and help them develop solutions that while rely on the mentor’s knowledge, but also play into the skillset, personality and preferences of the mentee. And from my perspective, a third secret component is the mentor’s ability to be vulnerable with their mentee, to share their struggles and challenges both past and present to build trust, a sense of safety and relatability with their mentee.
Mentoring, in a larger scope of the word, can be found in more informal contexts such as schools, companies, sports teams and even families. If I was to be very rigorous with my definition of the word, mentoring is a characterization of a set of conversations, that exist within a context of a specific domain of our lives. Mentors are not often found in spaces that they are not themselves experts in, as mentors will often aid mentees in a broader scope than simple conversations such as further introductions to aid the mentees pursuit of their goals.
What is a Coach?
A coach, again, also in my mind, is a behavioral expert who has a slightly different conversational practice to a mentor. Coaching is founded on the idea that their client has the capacity to solve their challenges. So, a coaches conversational practice is geared around asking the right questions, knowing the answer is inside of their client, it just needs to be brought to the surface.
Coaching conversations, regardless of the subset of coaching that they fall in, generally sit in one of two categories. The first is what I refer to as ‘transactional coaching’ which is that the client will share their goal with the coach and then the coach will ask questions to gain clarity on the goal, the necessary steps to achieve said goal, and then an action plan to begin working towards completing those relevant steps. The second is what I refer to as ‘transformational coaching’, whereby after the client shares their goal, the coach may ask something to the effect of “why do you want to achieve this goal?” to uncover the underlying layers of motivation that is driving the goal and work at a deeper level with their client to enhance their way of being, rather than focusing on a particular outcome.
What do coaches do?
Coaches, similarly to mentors will have a specialized field or niche that they work within, but this is not necessarily a golden rule with coaches.
Below are three common subfields of coaching and what they focus on:
Leadership Coaching: These coaches generally work with high level executives with regard to developing the skills and conversational practices to effectively lead teams to achieve joint outcomes.
High Performance Coaching: These coaches generally work in the goal setting space to help their clients create and fulfill ambitious visions.
Health and Wellness Coaches: These coaches will generally work with their clients to create healthier more balanced lives through nutrition, conscious relationships and health.
As for me, I’m a life coach. I work in the personal development space with my clients.
Coaches can have varied backgrounds depending on their niche. Popular coach training spaces are neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), popularized by Anthony Robbins’ work, the International Coach Federation provides training also to coaches wishing to become accredited. I myself have multiple degrees, diplomas and qualifications. But, one thing that is interesting to note, is that in over a decade of coaching in various arenas, I have not once been asked about them. It is often said amongst coaches that the barrier to entry is very low, but the barrier to attain and retain high quality clients is very high. I’ve been very blessed in that department.
As for the conversational practice itself, coaching purists will espouse that coaching at its heart is about asking questions. And that being a coach is in some way like being a detective to discover what is truly going on for someone. From my view, a lot of the growth that occurs during coaching is a combination of the conversations between the coach and coachee and the actions that the coachee agrees to take in between the coaching sessions.
Coaching Vs Mentoring
Regardless of whether it’s a mentor or a coach, having someone on your team, whose sole job is to bring out the absolute best in you can be incredibly useful. And today’s writing is in no way an attempt to create opposition to either approach. Having said that, here’s a pretty simple clue below as to what may be suited better for you.
Mentoring = If you are seeking very specific outcomes in a very narrow aspect of your life or business.
Coaching = If you are looking to get more out of yourself, develop new skills and grow.
Fortunately in my work, I create fully custom programs for my clients from the ground up based on the preferred approach.
If this is something you’d like to explore, book in for a free consultation with me here.
Max. Life Coach.
